An Ode to .. to the Minister of Cutting Red Tape, Seymour of the Grand Scissors

In a small, badly lit room in a large grey building
Sits a middle aged lady by the name of Bev,
In charge of keeping count of band aids
In the hospitals of the nation.
Hovering over her shoulder and noting her hourly output
Is an Assistant Watcher of Back Office Band Aid Counters
Observing both carefully from the corner office
Is the Area Manager (Human Resources)
Of the National Band Aid Reduction Agency,
Who spends three hours crafting an email which is sent
To the Interim Communications Manager (Special Projects)
Of the Ministry of Band Aids.
The Interim Communications Manager (Special Projects)
Reads the email and thinks about it for six hours,
Then reaches for his mobile phone and organises a lunch date
With the Acting Contracted Chief Commissioner
Of the Ministry of Cutting Red Tape.
Following the lengthy and enjoyable lunch,
The Acting Contracted Commissioner Of Cutting Red Tape
Wanders up to the Palace of Efficiency.
There sits the High Minister, Seymour of the Grand Scissors,
Munching peanuts behind his desk.
“Hi Boss – we’ve identified The Problem,”
Says the Acting Contracted Chief Commissioner. “What is The Problem?” Asks Minister Seymour.
“It’s Bev.”